It’s Good to be the Number Two

Since we are dealing with the subject of sequential siblings, I would like to talk about the first thing first.  I discovered that Mondays are terrible days to make blog posts, so here is yesterday’s, since judging by the stats so far, you probably missed it.  Dirty Talk in the 19th Century examines…well, I’ll let you discover that for yourself.

Also, L’homme Theroux debutes October 12, 2014.  More details to come.  And now, on to the second thing second.

The second in line of royal succession is definitely the primo spot.  Yes, you still have the same silliness to deal with that any Royal would have.  And I suspect the grooming is similar, but if the Spare Heir doesn’t learn exactly which fork to use or how to bow just right, is it really that big of a deal?  He is more or less going through the motions.  In this day and age, there is very little chance of the Spare Heir being used.  He winds up sitting in the trunk, slowly going flat from benign neglect.

It would take a literal act of God (or a very cleverly orchestrated crash of the family car) for Harry’s ass to ever be rubbed on the English throne.

Both English princes lost out on military assignments they wanted due to their position, although Harry did go to Afghanistan as a Forward Air Controller in Helmand Province before being pulled out after two and a half months (I spent a few days passing through his base during the time he was assigned there.  The little shit never once visited me).  Both the job and the location were fairly risky assignments, so I think that reinforces the point that the Spare Heir is allowed more latitude in what he can do.

As to his brother being a Search and Rescue pilot, my gut tells me William had just as dangerous a job.  Those guys get themselves into some serious trouble on occasion.  Of course, neither was a ground pounder, so my guess is there was at least a little protectiveness going on in their selection of jobs.  Even in combat zones, aviation is a very safe field.  We are what is known as risk averse.

But back to my point of second place being best.  When was the last time you heard of a second child complaining about all the pressure to succeed?  If my family was anywhere near typical, parents put all their hopes and dreams onto the first born.  Assuming that kid doesn’t have to wear a foam helmet or lick the windows of the short bus, the second child has a pretty easy path.

All the hard, foundation work was done by the oldest.  He wore the parents down on getting another car.  He did yeoman’s duty getting curfew pushed back.  The younger kids never get in serious trouble for dancing on a table with their pants down or giving fascist salutes in Germany.  An oldest child would have been in jail because he should have known better and is an example for his younger siblings.  The oldest child always takes the heat for all manner of getting in trouble and breaking down the parents to the point where they cease to care what any of the other kids do, so long as it doesn’t interrupt Dr. Who.

Yeah.  Being the Spare Heir is where it is at.


2 thoughts on “It’s Good to be the Number Two

  1. Kind of wish I wouldn’t have read this today…now I’m reliving the agony of being the eldest in the group. The wooden spoon wasn’t so bad but if you got it with just the edge of that fly swatter as you ran down the hallway bare-assed, whew!


    • I never got the edge of the flyswatter. Just the flat of the business end. I think my favorite was the time my mother hit me with a 2×4 across both ass cheeks. She had to use implements to have an effect. She wasn’t very big, and I was the size of a large man as a teenager. Honestly, I probably wasn’t hit enough as a child.
      Thanks for commenting, even though it might have been painful.

      Liked by 1 person

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